Roommates
by Zapetheen
Summary: Louise has to deal with her worst nightmare: Logan Barry Bush. If he were just around town it would be fine, but now's he's in her house. How will the two new roomies get along?
1. Chapter 1

"I'm surrounded by _idiots."_ I thought as my Calculus teacher droned on and on about y equals the square root of whatever. None of it mattered. High School was nothing but a prison that I was bound to escape soon.

I felt an arm tap my shoulder, and looked to see Ollie trying to discreetly pass a note to me – the keyword here being _try._ Ollie was still just as much of an idiot as he always was, but at least he and Andy managed to grow a little less insufferable over the years.

I quickly snatched the note before the teacher could notice, and opened it.

 _Louise,_

 _I heard a certain visitor is making a comeback soon. You sure you're prepared to handle it?_

 _\- Jessica_

"Visitor?" I muttered under my breath, wondering what the hell my fire-headed friend was talking about. Just as I was conjuring up possibilities, the bell rang and I begrudgingly leapt out of my seat and headed off towards my locker. Jessica approached a few seconds later.

"So do you know who it is?" Jessica asked, her face just as neutral as it always is.

"No," I replied, feeling slightly annoyed. I closed my locker and swung my backpack over my shoulder. "But I am intrigued. Is it anyone I should care about?"

This time Jessica smiled. Huh. A facial expression. Now I'm interested!

"Oh, an old enemy hath returned!" Old enemy? Hmm… That's a pretty big list.

"Old enemy? How old? There's Harley, Mr. Frond, Andy, Jamie, that old guy who roller-skates past us in the purple speedo on the way to school, Millie…"

"Louise it's – wait. When did you and Andy become enemies?"

"Oh, I stole his -."

"Never mind. I don't want to know. It's Logan." I froze. Oh, now that was a name I was not expecting to hear again.

Logan Barry Bush was the bane of my existence. Somehow, over the years, he'd managed to get under my skin worse than Millie. Luckily for me he skipped town to become a motivational speaker after ordering The King of Happiness's aka The Deuce of Diamonds aka The Prince of Persuasion's online webinar on motivational speaking. Freaking idiot didn't want to go to college and assumed he'd get big like those people who do the Ted Talks, but he failed, and his failure was glorious. I spent many hours a night just basking in his utter failure whenever he decided to do a live-stream on Yahoogled+ or host an online webinar. He had no idea how to motivate people beyond screaming at them; I loved it!

But that hilarious failure unfortunately put him back at square one – back in town and back near my ears. Crap! He's the LAST person I want to deal with right now!

"Ugh!" I huffed as Jessica and I walked to the restaurant. She started working here afterschool with me after Tina left to become a porn director in New York after hitting it big when she got her Erotic Friend Fiction published, and Gene started sound tracking Kevin James produced movies and humorous commercials. The restaurant was still just as empty as always, with a few scattered customers along with Teddy and Mort. Mort had long since abandoned his toupee, and Teddy had gotten gastric bypass surgery, so he mainly came in to talk to Dad.

"Hey Louise! Hey Jessica!" Teddy said as we entered. "You ladies having a good day so far?"

Jessica nodded, and I halfheartedly pulled my lips back into a smirk. Just then, mom walked in, and set a burger down at the booth in the back of the restaurant. I couldn't see who was seated back there, but I sure as hell could smell their cologne. It was one of those disgusting brands frat guys wore because they thought it could help them get laid – or stupid high school dropouts who thought it made them seem cool.

"Oh Louise! Your old friend Logan is here! Oh my, you're a big boy now, aren't you?" Mom said, and I felt my blood begin to boil. Who the hell does he think he is?! What is he doing here?! "Louise! Remember him! Oh, look at him! Why don't you come over here and take one of those, uh, those self-I things? You can post it on your Insta-Twit, or something."

My legs moved before my brain could stop them, and before I knew it I was at his booth, staring into the face of the Devil himself.

He looked just as awful as he usually did. His blue eyes were sunken and bloodshot, and his blond hair was ragged. He had grown bangs since then, and he pushed them haphazardly out of his eyes. He had some slight stubble grazing his pasty cheeks, and when I approached he looked up to meet my gaze. I saw a brief glimpse of recognition, but no fear. Has he forgotten what he did to me?

"Louise?" he said, smiling slightly. I could see his eyes begin to cloud over with… lust. Ugh! He's such a _guy._ "Is that you? I hardly recognized you."

"Hello _Logan,_ " I hissed, and his eyes widened in surprise. "What a surprise to see you here! Did you bring any large luggage?"

"Luggage? Why would I need -?"

"Because you must've in order to carry your huge balls here!" Logan jumped, and I slammed my hands down on his table.

"But Lou-boo -!"

"LOU-BOO? WHAT KIND OF HALF-BAKED, DUMBASS NICKNAME IS THAT?!"

"Okay Louise! That's enough!" Mom yelled, and she pulled me away. Logan continued to look dumbfounded, and I mentally cursed his existence again. I could hear Jessica snickering from the kitchen, and I shot her a glare as Mom pulled me down to the basement. "Louise, what's your problem?"

"He's my problem!" I spat. "Why did you allow him in here? You KNOW he's my nemesis!"

"Louise! Okay! Stop it! You're acting like a nutcase!" Oh, nutcase? Was she high? "Logan is a nice boy, and you will be nice to him as long as he is here, young lady!"

"No I will not be – wait! What do you mean as long as he's here?" As soon as I said that, mom got that goofy little smile on her face like she usually does when she thinks she's done something great. Oh no! She didn't! She couldn't have!

"Well, when Logan came into the restaurant…"

"Yeah…"

"He mentioned that he didn't have a place to stay…"

"No!"

"So I offered him Gene's room in exchange for helping around here!"

"AHHHHHHHH!" No! No! This couldn't be happening! "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! HAS THE WORLD GONE CRAZY! WHY?! WHY?! WHY?!"

"HEY! LOUISE! Calm down! This will be fun! You'll be little roommates!"

"THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING! THIS IS THE WORST THING THAT COULD POSSIBLY HAPPEN TO ME! NOOOO!" Her! This was her fault! I swear, I'm going to -.

"Okay! Bobby! She's got the tomatoes, Bobby! I'm going to need some help!"


	2. Chapter 2

After my little outburst, and a half hour of scrubbing tomatoes off the floor, I finally came upstairs to confront the beast himself. _Logan_. How do they expect me to work with him without killing him?

He had finished his burger, and was now picking gum from under the tables. I ignored him for the time being, and instead walked behind the counter next to dad. While he was talking to Teddy and Mort, I swiped the chalk and checked out the Burger of the Day. Hmm... "Munster Mash" burger is okay, I guess. You got the song reference, its fall, and it's a clever way to tie in Munster cheese into the title, but it's lacking pizzazz! I can fix this.

I quietly erased the name and wrote down "The Munster under Your Bed" burger - it comes with new bed sheets. Jessica looked through the window at the board, and snickered. Well, at least there is one good thing about this day.

"Hey, that's pretty funny, Louise!" Logan said, smiling meekly from his menial place under the table. Dad turned around and glared when he noticed me. Jesus Christ! UGH! I swear, he ruins everything!

"Louise, change the name back!" Dad demanded, putting his hands on his hips.

"Why, dad? It's funny!" I smiled, and Dad shook his head.

"No, it's not funny Louise! 'The Munster under Your Bed' burger? Come on! That's too simple." I huffed, and dad's frown intensified.

"I kinda like it..." Mort said, looking at the board.

"This doesn't concern you, Mort!" Dad hissed. "And it doesn't even make sense! Why would it come with bed sheets?"

"Because sometimes little kids pee themselves..." I said.

"What?" Dad exclaimed, and I rolled my eyes.

"You know, when they think a monster's hiding in their room." Dad's eyes widened, and I heard Logan and Jessica snicker louder.

"Oh!" Teddy sighed. "Hahahaha! Yeah, I remember wetting the bed when I was little. Ah! It's called anxiety, Louise. And it's a serious problem."

"Mhmm..." Dad groaned, and I begrudgingly erased the board.

"Yeah. I remember waking up in the morning to that. My dad would usually have to buy me a new bed." Okay, gross. "Talk about wet dreams, hey right, Mort? Hahahaha. Ugh! Sopping wet dreams."

"Okay, Teddy. That's enough!" I heard dad mutter as I disappeared into the kitchen.

Jessica was manning the grill. When I arrived, she turned to me, nodded, and handed me a block of cheese and some lettuce to slice. As I started cutting the ingredients, I caught a glimpse of Logan through the window.

Logan. He was sweeping behind the counter now, whistling and looking at the floor. When he noticed me, he smiled and waved, like everything was peachy between us. I glared at him, and turned my attention back to the tomatoes.

 _Slice. Slice. Slice._ I could kill him for what he did to me. _Slice. Slice._ That Christmas, out in the back alley, in the moonlight. _Slice._ I can't believe I let him take advantage of me like that! How could I be so -.

"Hey Louise! There's going to be a delivery out back! Could you go pick it up for me?" Dad asked, and I dropped my knife. "Logan, you better come to. It's a meat delivery, and I don't think Louise is strong enough to carry it herself!"

Is the whole world trying to ruin my life?!

I begrudgingly trudged towards the front door, avoiding Logan's curious gaze as we walked towards the alley. I could hear his stupid, cheap tennis shoes squeak against the concrete as I did. _Note to self. Cut those up and burn them later._

"So Lou-boo, how you been -." Did he just-?

"If you call me that accursed nickname again, I will murder you in your sleep!" I threatened, glaring menacingly at him. He gulped, finally getting the message, and we walked in silence out to the back. When the meat delivery guy came, he asked me to sign a form, but when I grabbed the pen, my hands were shaking too violently in anger to write legibly, so I threw the clipboard at Logan and reached for a box of beef.

The meat delivery guy gave me a funny look, but I was too pissed off to care.

After Logan signed the form, we unloaded a couple of boxes of meat and the truck drove away.

Now I was fully prepared to ignore this douche-nozzle, and pack the meat in silence. But Logan – freaking – Barry Bush was not.

"Louise, you remember the first time we came out here together! Man, it was such a wonderful time. Just us two, under the stars, making sweet lo – hey!" Logan ducked before my fist could catch his stupid face. Yet, that didn't stop me from swinging again. And again. And again. Fortunately for him, he ducked every time, dropping a box of meat in the process but missing my blows.

"I. Hate. You. Logan. Barry. Freaking. Bush!" I declared, seething. "How can you sit there, and say you can't understand that! Do I have to paint you a freaking picture?! Are you _that_ mentally disabled?!"

"Louise! What did I do?!" He said, with hurt in his eyes.

"You damn well know what you freaking did!" I said, shouting at this point. "And I shouldn't have to remind you! And stop looking at me like that! I swear, it's like your brain is directly linked to your cock sometimes."

I swung again, and missed, but Logan caught my hand this time. It caught me off guard, and I felt those same tingles I felt whenever I touched his rough, calloused hands against mine flare up again. Crap! No! Ihatehim. Ihatehim. Ihatehim! Curse this stupid vagina for making me feel freaking emotions!

"So that's what this is about." Logan said, smirking like a cheeky bastard. Fuck! No! Not again! "I swear; I keep forgetting how much of a kid you are sometimes. I'm sorry, Lou-boo. I'm sorry I left after such a great night together, but I promise I'm staying this time."

"Get your hands off me, you twit!" I screamed, feeling my resolve start to break. No. No! NO! I can't let him do this to me again! "The first time was a mistake, and I'm never letting you in again!"

"Oh, Louise! I'm hurt! How could you say that?" He fake-whined as he grabbed my other hand, making me drop my box of meat. "It was so wonderful. And I know you think so, too."

"It was horrible. You were horrible. You're still horrible. Now let me – mmph!" His lips crushed mine, and he pinned my wrists above my head and pressed me against the cold, rough, concrete wall as he kissed me. I wanted to push him away – I really did – but my stupid teenage hormones and my freaking vagina told my brain and will power; "Okay, you've had your fun, but today we're getting laid, so it's time out for you, honey!"

As he kissed me, images of that first time came flooding back – the moon, the stars, the danger and excitement of possibly getting caught – and I whimpered like a weak ass bitch. Damn it, he broke me!

I could feel his hands snaking towards my thighs. Those rough ass hands. Ugh, so hot!

Without warning, I pushed my tongue between his lips, and explored the inner caverns that his mouth held. He tasted like garlic, white wine, caper and ground beef. Mmm. The "Caper to Magic Yourself" burger. One of my personal favorites.

"Fuck, Louise…" He groaned, and grabbed my leg to wrap it around his waist. We broke apart to breathe, and he pressed his forehead against mine and looked deeply into my eyes. "I missed this."

"Yeah, well you fucked up. And you're still fucking up. But I'm going to give you this one last time, okay? Then we can go back to pretending like _this_ never happened." I said sternly, and he smiled.

"Oh, you can think that all you want, but I'll have you back in my arms soon enough." His blue eyes gleamed, and I glared at him.

"Logan Barry Freaking Bush. So stupid. You realize this is hate-fucking, right?" I said, still glaring at his love sick-gaze. "This isn't some sappy romance where the girl hates the guy but ends up with him anyway. You're a deadbeat 25-year-old high school dropout who has pretty much no future, and I'm a high school senior. This is actually kind of creepy, what we're about to do, which is why it's only happening just this once. _I'm using you._ "

He chuckled. "We'll see about that."

"God, I hate you!" I muttered, and pushed him away. "Our break starts soon, so let's hurry up and put this meat downstairs and head up to do this."

"But we can just -."

"I'm not having sex you in an alley in broad daylight, you idiot!"

* * *

After we put the meat in the freezer, I told dad that I was going on break, and I hung up my apron and walked outside. Jessica, being ever so observant, shook her head in disappointment and I stuck my tongue out at her as Logan and I headed out the door.

I wanted to go upstairs, but Logan actually came up with a good idea for once.

"They'll hear us if we stay at the house. I have a clubhouse by the beach. It's nice. You'll like it."

I doubted it, but I still hopped in his car anyway.

* * *

He was right. The clubhouse was kind of nice.

He had a little clubhouse a couple hundred feet away from his parents' beach house. It was pretty decently sized – big enough to fit the queen sized bed and two comfy looking medium sized bean bags that he'd left in there – and obviously recently renovated.

"Not bad Barry Bush." I said, looking around. Dark hardwood, a bookshelf, a little mini-fridge, and outlets: his parents must make some pretty decent money.

"Told you you'd like it." He said, smiling. "Feel the blankets."

I felt them – soft and buttery to the touch. "Satin. Nice."

"Imported." He bragged, smirking. "Now where were we?"

He strode towards me, and I held my hands up.

"We do this on my terms, Barry." I said, smiling as I saw his smirk fade.

"Okay. Anything you want."

"No poking. No prodding. No gentle caresses, and no declarations of love, okay – not even in the middle of an orgasm, okay." I grabbed his shirt. "For the next 30 minutes, you're mine. Don't disappoint me."

"Yes ma'am!" He replied excitedly, and picked me up. He kissed me deeply, and I felt him place me down in a pool of buttery satin. Mmm… Cold satin and a warm Logan. Fuck, I never thought I'd like this.

We broke apart, and my impatience took over. I couldn't wait any longer. I flipped him over and straddled him, and he smirked again as I nearly ripped his shirt trying to take it off of him. I purred in delight when I saw the tattoo he had on his chest: the word _Diablo_ written in calligraphy. He's the devil, and he knows it, doesn't he?

I felt his hands snaking up my back, and then my green dress pool around my waist. I quickly flung it off of me, and he flipped me back over onto my back.

As he pressed his lips to mine again, I heard his pants unzip and I groaned impatiently. He kicked his pants from around his ankles, and climbed on top of me. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, and dug my nails into his flesh. 25 minutes. Doing good so far.

He broke our kiss, and we both started panting.

"How do you want it?" he asked, his blue eyes blazing.

"Faster than a hurricane." I replied, biting my lip impatiently. He smiled, and I felt him pull my black lace panties off of me and poise himself at my entrance – the fat tip of his cock was dripping with precum. "For the love of god, don't make me wait!"

"So impatient, little one." He stated, and then slammed into me – impaling me with his full length. I moaned, and my toes curled as I felt myself stretching and straining to accommodate him. Christ, I need to get laid more. "My god, has anyone fucked you since that night?"

"No – oh god, Logan – mmm. Stop teasing me, you ass!" I moaned, feeling my legs start to tense as the pleasure took over. He snickered, and began to slowly pull out of me, millimeter by millimeter, and I bit my lip to keep from moaning like a wounded puppy. God, ihatehim, ihatehim, ihatehim!

"Ooo… So good. Mmm. Can you handle it, my little bunny!" He teased, as I felt him exiting his last inch out of me torturously slow. 23 minutes.

"Logan, stop doing – AH! FUCK!" He impaled himself deep in me again, and I started shaking. He laughed, and pinned my legs above my head. 20 minutes. "God, I hate you!"

"You won't for the next 20 minutes." He said, smirking. "Now be a good little bunny, Louise, and beg."

Beg? "Not on your fucking life."

Then he did it again – pulled himself out of me torturously slow, then impaled his full length into me, making my toes curl and my legs shake as my stupid vagina resisted him with every stroke. It was a slow build up to the main fucking event, and he was killing me!

15 minutes.

"Okay, fine! Igivein! Igivein! Please fuck me, Logan! Please!" I begged, feeling my eyes start to tear up.

"That's my bunny…" He said, smiling. Then he _finally_ started to pick up the pace. Slowly, his strokes became shorter – full length, 3/4ths length, 1/2 length, ¼ length, 1/8 length – and more frequent. Then his pace quickened, and I could no longer control myself. My moans became louder, and my eyes started watering. He grabbed my legs, and pinned them behind my head as he fucked me, moaning my name as he did.

"Oh, you're sick! You're so sick! Yes! Oh, Logan!" I screamed as I felt my own orgasm coming. All I needed was that last… little… push…

He wrapped his hand around my throat, and that threw me off the edge as I climaxed, screaming his name as I did. My orgasm was so violent, I had to grab onto the sides of the bed and dig my feet into the mattress to keep from flailing like a toy.

"Oh my god! Louise!" He groaned as I felt him empty his seed into me. "Oh, Christ, you better be on birth control!"

After we were both spent, he pulled out of me and we both just laid there, panting. 5 minutes.

"You got a place where I can clean up?" I asked, and he nodded.

"I'll let you in the house. Bathroom is to your left. And Louise?"

"Yeah, Barry?"

"Don't think that this is the last time." He declared, smiling triumphantly. "The devil never quits."


End file.
